Archive for the ‘psychiatrist’ Tag

BE CONFIDENT   Leave a comment

Any child of the 80’s growing up in western society has likely witnessed the fantasy movie The Neverending Story.  It, like most works of fiction, contain within it profound truths. I have already mentioned some of these truths from other works of art in previous posts. The Neverending Story is of no exception.

There is a very powerful scene in the movie that has Atreyu, the hero of the story (metaphorically representing the everyman, or all of us), facing an ominous and foreboding obstacle in his search for the Southern Oracle (metaphorically representing Truth) This obstacle (a gate of golden Sphinxes) can see straight into the hearts of all beings and to pass through one must have full confidence in themselves, shedding all doubt, or else they will be destroyed by the gate. Atreyu approaches the gate cautiously and is overwhelmed by the presence of the Sphinxes. He notices a fallen hero before him and begins to doubt himself. Then, at the last moment, he musters his confidence and runs through the gate unscathed and is able to continue his journey (metaphorically representing the journey of life)

Click the title below for the scene.

Through The Spinxes

This is very relevant to our everyday lives and highlights the importance of self-confidence in our life’s progression. For we all will face obstacles, large and small, and must have the confidence to push through to reach our goals and see our dreams to fruition. One’s confidence often has a converse relationship to self-doubt. However, I must make it clear that doubt in itself is not inherently negative. Doubt is a path to wisdom for it forces us to question our motives, beliefs, and the workings of the world around us. Doubt can serve as a reality check for us to temper expectations and change our course for our own betterment. Doubt is the reason science has advanced humanity so far from its primal past.

Yet, persistent or malignant self-doubt has a paralyzing effect for if we lack confidence we will likely fail at what we are doing. Whether, for example, it’s a task on the job or having fulfilling social interactions. Subsequently we will not be who we are and if we do not be who we are we tend to make negative self-judgments about ourselves or regret and ruminate upon our failed opportunities. Thus, stunting our personal growth. This has a negative feedback loop and often we continually reinforce our lack of action/being to our continued detriment.

I personally have dealt with the conflict of doubt and self-confidence, particularly during my adolescent years. Like so many of us this was a time of great identity formation and confusion as I transformed into an adult. For many as it was for me, this is the great Sphinx that stands in our way. My obstacle was to liberate myself from the opinions and judgments of others. I allowed peer pressure to keep me down. Once I no longer permitted that pressure I was able to tap into my own confidence and strive on to where I am today and into who I will become in the future. It feels good to be confident.

I view malignant self-doubt to be a form of delusion not only because it invokes irrational beliefs about ourselves and leads to negative thinking, but because it simply is an expression of a false self, for the human potential is limitless.

Take the example of our best professional athletes. They have supreme confidence in their abilities. They help their teams win games and believe fully in themselves. They work hard to better themselves and their confidence serves as motivation to do so. Muhammad Ali famously said “I am the Greatest” and he was. A perfect example of full confidence at work. The same can be applied to those who have achieved great things in their life and lived their lives to the fullest, they were confident. They knew who they were and knew they could be who they wanted to be, just as confident people continue to be and do today.

Let me be perfectly clear, YOU can do it, YOU can be who you are and grow.

What are your obstacles? What are the reasons and excuses you are coming up with that are paralyzing you and leading you into negative thought processes? Whatever they maybe is it not time to shed this doubt and free your energy to reach your greatest potential?

The time is indeed NOW.

BE CONFIDENT!

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Non-Verbal Communication   Leave a comment

Some argue that our advanced ability to communicate vocally is the primary aspect that has led the humans to become the dominant species on the planet.

However, it is important to realize that most communication taking place between people is non verbal. Rather, it is our body language with our posture and gestures that do most of the talking for us.

When we are aware of this we can improve our communication skills and express ourselves more effectively.

Below is a graphic which highlights some of the messages we send through our body language along with tips of how to improve upon our visual expressions so that others will understand us that much better;

Say what you mean

Attribution to Online Universities.com

 

http://www.onlineuniversities.com/body-language (Source of picture)

Embrace the Darkness to Know the Light.   Leave a comment

If you live in the northern hemisphere you are experiencing the longest nights of the year culminating in the darkest day of all, the Winter Solstice.  Each day afterward the sun will rise higher in the sky and the days will grow longer leading to the peak of light at the Summer Solstice.

I believe the most prominent theme of the Winter Solstice is the symbolic death and rebirth process which happens over and over again in our lives. In fact, on the cellular level you will over time become a completely different human being as every cell in your body is replaced by a new one. Those of us who reside further away from the equator witness the rise and fall of the plants as each year they lay down their leaves into dormancy, only to return when the spring arrives.

The Winter Solstice is a time to reflect upon the past year, spend time with loved ones, and look forward to the future. Hence why so many cultures and religions celebrate this time of year with holidays. (i.e. the birth of Christ) Although the darkness may reign supreme now we know with full confidence the light and warmth shall return.

Now is the death of the year; the vibrant spring and summer days of the year’s youth have past leaving the trees without leaves and the air cold. The animals, including us humans, are experiencing bodily changes in connection with the colder days and longer nights.  We tend to feel more tired and desire more rest. We become more susceptible to depression if we lack enough exposure to sunlight.

The lack of light and increased time spent indoors can also lead us to greater levels of introspection and reflection. There can be an examination of the consequences that have come about from the choices we have made. The outer darkness of the world pulls us to examine our inner darkness, the shadow which resides in all of us. For some people this can be a terrifying abyss to behold. So, distraction in its many forms may take place to avoid a confrontation with the self.

However,  to deny our darkness is to deny a reforging and sharpening of our being. By denying those traits and aspects of our selves which we dislike (laziness, lustfulness, selfishness, fearfulness, etc)  we actually give power over to them. It takes greater psychic energy to repress and keep them in their natural domain of subconscious darkness, where they grow in power and effect us outside of our awareness, than to bring them into the light to be integrated into the totality of our being.

Our shadow not only gains power through our denial but also through our own self guilt. Often we will punish ourselves for sexual thoughts, thoughts of rage, and  selfish desires.  Anything we deem wrong or unworthy about ourselves we may react to in a self-punitive manner. We may also project our shadow upon others. When we perceive someone expressing traits we dislike our reactions are telling. Could the person condemning the lazy actually like to indulge in laziness,? Yet hates this aspect of him or her self for whatever reason(s).

What can your judgements of others tell you about yourself? What does your perceived deficiency in someone else say about you?

Over the course of the year with choice after choice the internal shadow baggage increases within. So to does the outer darkness of the waning daylight. The long nights of late fall and winter pull us towards the inner self and the opportunity for renewal is at hand. The light surrenders to the dark so that it can be reborn and rise again.

This is the quintessential time of the new year, it is why so many people make resolutions for the future. We all sense a chance for a fresh start. The molting of the psyche takes place and reveals a new skin.

Use this time for what it is. Surrender to your mistakes, your weaknesses. Revel in your flaws. Cry, forgive yourself, and be reborn as you return to the vibrant light of the spring and summer within.

These shadow qualities are a part of you just as much as all of your most admirable ones. You would not be you without them. Use that rage as creative energy or to improve your physical condition, use that sexual desire with your partner(s) to liven up the relationship(s) or indulge with your fantasies and discard the shame you associate with them. Be lazy, take a break and rest. Its ok.

You cannot understand the concept of light without understanding the concept of no light. You cannot achieve what Carl Jung calls individuation, or the establishment of your true self that is distinguished from the collective, without integrating your negative traits into your conscious, every day life.If you deny yourself of your less admirable qualities or shroud them with guilt you will be unable to fully recognize and express your admirable ones.

The Winter Solstice and the procession of the Sun represents an immediate and consistent environmental reminder of the death/rebirth process of the physical world. It is a process however, that can happen at anytime of your choosing in the realm of the psyche.

When will you make the choice?

Patience. It doesn’t have to happen yesterday.   3 comments

How many times have we heard the old saying “Patience is a virtue”? More than we can count probably.

 

But who needs patience when we have instant access to information, instant communication, and instant transaction? This is the 21st century baby! We don’t have time for patience for “I want it now!” is the theme of this day. Let the quickening quicken there’s no time to waste don’t blink or you will be left in the dust.

 

Before you know it we have made choices and carried out actions without much thought, sometimes not to the benefit of our own well-being, and sometimes our haste and expectations themselves lead us to stress.

 

Expectations.

 

How often do we get frustrated when we look at the present moment and what we have envisioned for the present moment has not occurred? Frustration almost always sets in. We may even feel depressed and hopeless, especially when we have made the choices and taken the steps that should be manifesting our vision. WHY IS IT NOT HAPPENING NOW!?

 

Part of the issue could be our lack of patience. We have become so accustomed to having our needs and desires satiated immediately with our iphones and androids that we become anxious when we find ourselves in situations where there is a delay, even slight ones.

 

Please remember,

 

This planet is 4.5 billion years old, this universe is 15 billion years old. Things take time to manifest. Even our lives are not very short, even though we keep hearing how short they are. It is our memory of the past that deceives us as the moments of the past are instantaneous in our memory and we perceive it as a much shorter span of time. For example, a 30 year old person is almost 11,000 days old, having been what is considered an adult for almost 4,400 days.

 

So, your business plan might take a little longer to bring in the kind of profit that you have expected but if you are making the right choices, while directing your attention and intention with the proper action, IT WILL HAPPEN.

 

While you are in the midst of your frustration, near panic, and possibly sinking into depression have you taken any time to look around and see WHAT IS AVAILABLE in the present? The present, after all, is a gift. Often times opportunities and proverbial “doors” are open right in front of us to be used for our own benefit. However, if our minds are too wrapped up into the future we will not see them.

 

Turn off the phone for a minute, set it aside, put the laptop on hibernate and take in the moment for what it is. Appreciate what you do have. Listen to others around you, what do they have to say? Can it be something to your benefit? Tap into the flow of the present, we don’t always have to be doing, it doesn’t have to happen yesterday, its OK TO BE.

 

We are after all human BEINGS.

Yoda’s Wisdom   4 comments

Yoda Knows.

Yoda’s Wisdom – #1

Yoda’s Wisdom – #2

 

 

So simple, yet so profound.

 

The 800 year old Jedi master truly is a wise being for he knows truths that, when applied, benefit our well-being. Yet, often when presented with these simple truths many of us choose to reject them and seek out more complex and convoluted conclusions.

 

Deny it, denounce it, whatever. It is no secret that many of us inflate
the difficulty of resolving issues in our lives to the point where we
actually believe we are incapable of resolving them. When we hold the
belief that we are incapable of resolving our problems and improving upon
our own well being our behavior and thinking falls in alignment with
this belief. We in fact do not resolve our problems nor do we improve
upon our own well being. Thus, the suffering endures. In all honesty it is such a waste of time and is so unnecessary.

Often do I hear from people “Well, I guess i’ll give it a try” in that
oh so familiar depressive tone that speaks far louder than the words
themselves. What that tone says is “I can’t” which ultimately means “I won’t”.
When I hear these words from people I must refer them to to the wisdom
of Yoda.

 

Do it. Make it happen. If you don’t do it, then it doesn’t
happen. There is no in between, there is no try!

 

Does depression feel like being trapped in the Abyss of Nothingness &
Despair? YES. Does anxiety feel like being ,well, trapped? YES. Does
this mean one is incapable of untrapping themselves? Incapable of
climbing out of the Abyss of Nothingness? The answer is a resounding NO!

Know that there is always HOPE. No matter what the obstacle, no matter
how insurmountable it may seem. I don’t care what anyone with letters in
front of and after their name says. There is always hope and
possibilities are available for even the most impaired. Let nobody sway you
otherwise. Don’t just believe you are capable of healing. Go higher than that. KNOW YOU ARE
CAPABLE OF HEALING.

If you know and be that which you are you can achieve anything for you
and I are the creators of the Universe.

Remember why you have failed, learn from it, grow, and make it happen.
You can start right now if you so choose. Why not start now?

Climbing Over Your Wall and Undamming Your Flow…..But Remember, There is No Wall.   3 comments

There is an excellent clip in the philosophically inspiring action film, The Matrix, that sums up this article in its entirety. Please take a brief moment to watch so that your mind is receptive to the words to follow.

 

 

There is No Spoon

 

 

When we are examining the present state of our lives we will at times come to the conclusion that we are not living a purposeful life, one that is fulfilling and one that is in alignment, one that nurtures our well being. It is almost like writer’s block in that we find ourselves unable to tap into our power and manifest the life of our dreams through the direction of our will. We feel stuck in place.

 

We may find that negative aspects of our psyche hold more influence over us and lead us to make choices that are not always to our benefit. Others may or may not perceive this about you as well. We may be self-medicating with drugs to deal with this even if we are not aware that we are doing so.

 

If you find yourself in this situation then perhaps there is a wall in place. A wall that is damming your creative flow and inhibiting the true expression of your self. Until the wall is removed the blockage will continue and the circular patterns of emotions and behaviors to which you feel trapped in will continue on.

 

There are two primary steps to keep in mind when addressing this issue. First is to recognize your wall. The second is knowing that there is no wall, You can’t climb this wall as that is impossible, that it is you who must bend your will and render the wall into nothingness (pretty much just as was said in The Matrix clip)

 

To be able to recognize your wall you must keep a clear,open mind, without judgments or conclusions. You must then turn inward and examine the totality of your being, your memories, and everything that is you. So long as your mind is open and your search is active you WILL discover your wall.

 

My wall, for example, was an unresolved estranged relationship with a loved one. I was aware of this wall but I underestimated its power over me and it was not until I resolved this situation that the second step automatically took place, the wall vanished. I was tapped back into my purpose and my creative flow was free to allow the full expression of my will and to once again create my life as I so will it towards the betterment of my own being and that of others.

 

So that’s it in a nutshell, Once you recognize your wall you can address it, once you address it and resolve it the wall will disappear and your true self will re-emerge to fulfill the purpose of whatever purpose you wish to fulfill.

 

 

But always remember, ultimately, there is no wall.

 

Stay Peaceful.

 

 

The Power and Great Imperative of the Imagination   1 comment

The Power of the imagination is only limited by one’s own mind. The creative spirit that resides within all of us is boundless if one can recognize it, tap into it, and bring it forth into the three dimensional world of physical reality.

 

In fact, the imagination is operating all the time even if we are not aware of it. Our entire perception of the world is shaped by our imagination WHETHER YOU CHOOSE TO BELIEVE IT OR NOT. Your choice not to believe is in fact an imaginative construct created by yourself, a belief. Indeed, Quantum physics is showing us that the observer determines the outcome. However, I will not digress further into this particular matter as this is the domain of others.

 

So, try to absorb that for a moment and ponder about the things in your life that are not going well. Start to question yourself and your beliefs. You may realize that the way you are imagining and therefore perceiving the world is going against your own well-being. That it is YOU who are creating your own suffering and therefore contributing to the collective suffering of the world. A sad tale indeed. Yet one that is far to prevalent in our world today.

 

Does somebody want to remind me why we choose the path of suffering?

 

Look, I am not denying an external reality to which we participate in and depend on to exist in our bodies. What I am trying to say is that we as part of creation co-create creation on the psychic level. Yes, there are influences in our “external” reality (how our brains process it at least, but that would make it ultimately “internal” reality, wouldn’t it.) that lead us to choose to believe in and imagine a world where we, by our own free will, lower ourselves into an almost hypnotic zombie (theres that ever present growing meme again) like trance.

 

You know the drill; wake up, coffee (We are a nation of caffeine addicts), go to work, come home, television, sleep, then wake up and repeat. Further contributing to the trance is the multitude of easily accessible electronic devices (i.e. Laptop, Ipod, Ipad, Iphone, Internet, TV, etc), unhealthy drinks and foods coupled with poor eating habits, and subliminal programming (often negative, i.e. advertising, the news, etc.) that overwhelms our senses on a daily basis distracting us from our true selves and ultimately our true purpose.

 

Is it then any wonder we have convinced ourselves to believe that the world is dull, boring, and mundane? With little hope, full of fear, aggression, suffering, and hatred? Can it therefore really be a surprise to anyone that our world is now overwhelmed by this excremental aspect of our psyches as human beings?

I believe Carl Jung was right, it is psychic events that are the greatest threat to our species.

 

Here is what happened;

 

We have forgotten who we are. We have fallen asleep at the wheel.

 

We are the creators of the universe. That’s right, its true. Yes, our universe is that awesome. Its ok, you can accept it, for that is what it is and that is who we are. Embrace it. WAKE UP!

 

Are we not long past the time to stop creating a world out of balance? Ever skewing closer to the realm of negativity and ultimately oblivion? BY OUR OWN WILL NONETHELESS!

 

Or, would we rather create a world where peace, joy, happiness, goodwill, life, and even magic(k) reign across the land and sea until the end of days?

 

I don’t know about you but I think the choice is pretty obvious. I know what choice I’ve already made.

 

What about you? Afterall, the entirety of the universe starts with YOU.

 

I am quite hopeful, maybe you will be, or already are. If so, GREAT! If not, what are you waiting for?

 

Stay Peaceful